I had to document this.

Last night I had the strangest, most vivid dreams. The kind of dreams that when you wake up, you can't decide if it really happened or not.

So I have just gotten out of bed, poured my coffee and now I am sitting down at my computer to write down all the weirdness that happened as I slept.

Dream Sequence #1: I had a teaching interview and the Principal LOVED me, but then for a test I had to chop a huge salad and didn't understand the instructions she gave me. It was a HUGE salad, artichokes, jicima, mushrooms, fresh cilantro, etc. This principal had explicit instructions on how she wanted each veggie cut and it made no sense to me.

I didn't get the job.

Dream Sequence #2: Hubby was a secret gang member. And I was a secret undercover gang unit vice squad person. I busted him at a "gang party" (whatever that is) and found his behavior totally sexy. Told him later that night that I wanted to be a part of his gang world. But his gang party was more like a KA party at Tech.

Another f'ed up dream.

Dream Sequence #3: Bram knew Spanish. I don't know any Spanish. I couldn't communicate with my child.

Last Dream Sequence: We had an abandoned house next door to us. I let a bunch of homeless kids live in it on the sly. One of them sold beautiful silver jewelry that oddly enough, had my monogram etched in a lot of the pieces.

So I kept the 6 of them living their on the down low. I even was excited because I had, "FREE BABYSITTING!" Because what mom could pass up free babysitting by a bunch of squatters living in the abandoned house next door to them?

All of these dreams were just one right after another. And so vivid and real. All I ate for dinner was chicken and asparagus. All I drank yesterday was water with lemon. And I even ran for 45 minutes last night.

I am slowly losing my mind.

One dream at a time.