Turkey Day pics

Finally getting my hands on this baby girl!!! My cousin and his wife lived in Virginia when Jane was born and are finally back in Fort Worth. Yea!


Tess and Jane getting to know one another.

Look at these baby girls in all of their pink glory! Jane is 9 months younger than Tess yet has the same amount of hair. Sad.

See Bram's new "smile" he uses at each and every posed pic? If he sees a camera pointed at him, this cheesy grin comes on his face. And what is sad, is this child has the most beautiful smile, dimples and all. Hopefully this is something he will outgrow. It kind of reminds me of that episode of "Friends" when Chandler and Monica were trying to take engagement pictures.

Bram could not take his hands off of Jane, but she was getting tired of all his manhandling at this point in the evening.

Here is Miss Tess, kicked back on the couch, enjoying her baba after her big turkey dinner!! Priceless.

And yes she still has her bottle at night. Shut up.

Hope everyone had as much fun as we did!!!!! Happy Holidays!!

It keeps getting better

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving yesterday and I hope everyone else did as well.

I got to wear my new sweater, for that I was thankful. I didn't overeat and desert did not touch my lips, for this I am thankful.

But today, oh today. Today is Prime Rib lunch on the "mothership", aka: Gran-T and Mikey's. Today it is on. I paced myself yesterday, a small serving of a little of this, a little of that.

Not today.

Prime rib with creamy horseradish, PW's spicy mac and cheese, creamed spinach, roasted sweet potatoes and onion, feta salad, and homemade rolls. This is my all time favorite meal in the entire whole wide world and all of eternity.

Don't get me wrong, the traditional T-day meal yesterday was nice and a lovely way to start of of the holiday season, but it isn't worth gorging on. Today's meal is worth getting sick over.

Can y'all tell my big butt is super excited!!!

On another note, my cousin who has been trying and trying for a baby had in vitro (I mentioned several posts ago) and is pregnant with TWINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Talk about this being an extra special Thanksgiving! We are all giddy with the thought of not one but two precious babes joining our ever growing family.
Thanks for all of y'alls prayers for her when requested. It obviously worked double.

I also finally got to meet my cousin's new baby girl, Jane. And boy is she a cutie. Tess thought she was pretty cool, but y'all should of seen my Brammy. He was all over that baby, kept asking to hold her, patting her, kissing her, talking in his weird high pitched baby voice. It was darling. If that didn't convince Hubby that we need another bambino, then I don't know what else would.

Tomorrow Gran-T and I are taking Bram to see the "Polar Express" at the Fort Worth Children's Museum. Another fun day. Love the holidays!!!!

Happy Thanksgiving and yes I know.

OK, my header was not jacked up and off center on my computer at home. So when Deb made a comment about it, I thought she was perhaps just drunk.

But it is actually off center and I don't know how to fix it. I will do it later, there is much preparation to do this morning for this afternoons food festival.

Right now I am sipping on an Irish coffee and watching the Macy's parade. I am kind of pouty pants because it is going to be 70 degrees today and it might be too hot to wear my cute sweater. Miss Tess will be wearing her new Oilily romper with tights, regardless the weather.

That is the ONLY thing that sucks about living in Texas, weird weather. But anyhoo....

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!! I hope everyone has a wonderful day filled with fun, family, food and football!

Quick question

How does this:

Hijack this:

Am I missing something?

Food Festival 2008, Go hard or go home!

We leave tomorrow for the homeland, aka Weatherford, Texas, to spend the food festival holiday with my parents. YIPPEE!! My mother, aka Gran-T, and I have been preparing the Thanksgiving agenda for quite some time.

Thursday we are heading to my Aunt's house for traditional Thanksgiving lunch. This is always fun, my cousins are super cool and we have all grown up together. AND I will finally get to meet my cousin's 5 month old munchkin, Jane.

Friday, Hubby leaves for the stupid idiot hunting lease, he sucks. But my dad, aka Mikey, is doing his famous Prime Rib and his brother and fam will be joining us for a day late Thanksgiving meal. This is another fun family that I can't wait to spend time with.

Hopefully on Friday, Gran-T and I will be able to head to Granbury for some shopping on their precious little square. You can get yourself a little glass of Texas wine and sip and shop around the square. Oh-la-la, even better. We are also planning on taking Mr. Bram to the Ft Worth Zoo and the Children's Museum and Omni. A highlight of the weekend.

So I am going to be super busy socializing and eating and drinking and shopping. I just can't wait.

On a sucky note, my parents house is a terrible place for one year olds. They have stairs and a sunken living room. All this with hardwood floors and Mexican tile. Ugh. This can really wear a mom out. Especially when that mother's little angel doesn't sit still ever! Ever.

To put a positive spin on it, at least I will easily burn off some calories from my intended food festival. Their house is also a dreamy dream for ages two and up. 10 acres to run free, jeeps, chickens, pool, toys galore, and granparents that will take you "toy shopping" at every request. Also an unlimited supply of popsicles.

Y'all will love to know that I got the cutest most happiest photo for my Christmas card. I am super glad that first one was fuzzy because the one that made the cut is precious. Funny thing is, Bram from waist up is in his plaid Polo button up with a khaki sweater. Waist down, Batman. Shhhhhhhhhh......nobody will ever know.

God! I want to be a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader so freaking bad!!!!

I had to get that out. Carry on..

It's Christmas time in small town USA!!

We had so much fun at our little Christmas parade on Friday night. The weather was nice and chilly, just perfect to bundle the kids up and watch the floats.

I totally thought I was being a bad ass photographer, but after looking at the pics, the parade shots are no bueno. But I did get some cute ones of the kids and Santa!

Apparantely, there are not one but two "dance groups" in our town that consist of "dancers" 70 years of age and older. They have little choreographed routines they do in the parades and at nursing homes and such. I was not aware of this until Friday night, and I have to say it was the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life!

I hope it will still be around in 40 years so I can join. I will be all over those lit up lawn chairs that they spun around and held over their heads with pride while dancing and shaking to Garth Brooks version of "Jingle Bell Rock". All the while wearing lots of bedazzled shirts and pants. Gold spray painted keds and red cowboy hats. Good times!

Bram waiting for Santa to come down Main Street!

There he is!
It was really cold, but Bram refused his hat and wouldn't put his hood up. Of course not.

Daddy and Bram watching the Harley guys with their motorcycles all lit up!

Tess loved it! She sat for the full hour with a smile on her face and her eyes wide open. So much fun.

On another note, I ordered my Christmas cards and thought they were just precious. Cute candid pic, cute card, cute saying. Loved it.

And then Tiny Prints called today and said after they reviewed it the picture is pretty fuzzy. Son of a bitch! This means I have try again today so they can proceed with my order. UGH!! My kids are totally not cooperating.

All I need is a cute picture of them kissing. Is that too much to ask?

Christmas card 2007

This was the picture used last Christmas. I'll give you a moment to take it all in.

I did a Christmas card/Baby announcement combo so this was the picture we used to introduce Miss Tessie Mayes and to wish everyone a Merry Christmas.

We had a professional come to our home and take pictures, this was not my doing. I think this will always be my most cherished picture of both the kids. I love it.

AND this is going to be pretty damn hard to top. Agree?

This isn't going to be easy....

Taking a good Christmas card pic that is. Ugh! I am a total Christmas card snob. I love everything about it and love getting them as much as sending them out. And I start searching for a cute card as early as August.

We had professional pictures taken at the beach in August, but the baby has grown so much since then, she has three strands of hair as opposed to just one. Very important. So those won't work.

I have been taking all sorts of pics of both kids. Poor babies can't do a thing without a camera in their faces. And my neighbors probably think I am nutso, if they didn't already (which I think they did). Camera around my neck, making Bram hug Tess over and over so it doesn't look like he has her in a choke hold. I kept making them kiss so much yesterday that Tess finally got tired of it and took a whack at her brother. Session over!

Needless to say, two weeks of Coco Photography isn't capturing anything card worthy. Tess is a wiggle worm so I always end up getting the back of her head or an arm. And Bram is starting to do that weird 3 year old fake smile thing. As soon as he sees the camera and is ready to pose, he clenches his teeth together and squints his eyes. Not cute.

So tonight is our towns "Parade of Lights", which I am looking forward to. I am looking forward to it because I can feel a great Christmas card picture in the works. The weather will be cold, the town will be lit up, the kids will be all bundled in there winter coats and hats, and their faces will be excited watching Santa and his reindeer walking down Main Street. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh. A girl can dream can't she?

Keep your fingers crossed I can get some sort of picture that is festive, casual, sweet, yet peaceful of BOTH kids. Please Lord.

Who cares about a crashing stock market or that unemployment is at its highest in 13 years. What is really important is that I have what I believe is the cutest Christmas card ever!!!!!!

Priorities people. Priorities.

Three year old QUOTE OF THE DAY

"Is that corn in her poop?"

He arrived safe and sound

Our little Elf on the Shelf arrived yesterday.

Bram was super pissed, he wanted a real elf, so this little doll was not cutting it. No ma'am.

After a long discussion about how it is a real elf inside of the doll, he seemed to get excited. We read the book and Bram was to chose a name.

He chose the name "Frisky." I honestly have no idea where that came from but that is our elf's name.

Frisky the elf is already being put to work, I was going to wait until December 1, but why waste even a single day of his disciplining goodness. Frisky is being put to work early at the Coco house.

This is going to be fun!

Ranch weekend photos

Friday night arrival night, Maren, Jessica, me, and Kelley

Kelley and I pledged Chi-O together a long time ago, 15 years ago, and it has been true love ever since!

Saturday after our walk, sitting on the dock drinking a Bud Light Lime. No husbands and no kids. Perfection.

Kim, Maren, and Erin also enjoying a cold one after our walk.

Getting ready to go watch the Tech vs. OSU game at a local resort. My eye looks a little wild in this picture. But I am sober here. Promise. Jessica was my big sis, but now just one of my best friends.

Erin and Kelley.

Kim, Kelley, Jessica, Maren, Erin, me, and Jean. Jean's new addition, Lily, was only 7 weeks this Ranch Weekend, so she joined us for the Saturday night festivities.

So here are the pics. Such a homely group of friends I have. Kind of sad really. Luckily they all found men that would marry and reproduce with them.

I do see these girls throughout the year and talk to most of them weekly, if not daily. But there is just something about our Ranch Weekends that are special.

I am very very lucky to call each and every one of them my friend.

Can't wait until next year!!!!!

Such a little lady.

It is so much fun watching Tess play like a big girl. We had dinner with friends on Monday night and they had an entire kitchen and grocery store set up. This little shopping cart was a huge hit with my little lady.

So I guess I am going to have to call Santa up and let him know he needs to add it to our ever growing list.

Speaking of list, Bram is becoming a stingy little fellow. Each and every toy he sees on television, he says, "I want Santa to bring me that!"

He even put a request in for some Aqua Globes.

Funny Bram story

Tonight Hubby decided he wanted to go on my run with me. We put Bram and Tess in the double jogger, Phil and Ted's and I highly recommend, and started on our three mile trek.

Hubby runs a lot faster than I do, and I am terrible jogging with the jogger. It totally messes up my form. If I even have a form. But I think I do.

Hubby and I are jogging and Hubby is pushing the kiddos and I say, "Babe, you are in good shape!" because he is always complaining about how bad of shape he is in.

So then Bram says, "Daddy, you are in good shape!"

About two minutes later, Hubby stops running.

Immediately Bram says, "Well, I guess you aren't in good shape after all."

Out of the mouths of babes.


On another note, guess who just got a spanking wearing only a Superman cape?

I love the holidays!

Miss Tess getting excited about her first school Thanksgiving.

Mrs. Woodward, the saintly woman who is helping make Bram a big boy. He adores her, and she adores him. Who can resist this kids charms?

My little Brammy getting ready to sing the turkey song. Can y'all pick out his glowing Paul Newman beauty in the group?

One darling little Indian. He loved his "headdress" and beads. He is my son after all.

Telling Hubby something very important. That face is his new "serious" expression. If he has something important to say, that is the face you get.

Tess is watching every move her big brother makes these days. She is seriously going to give him a run for his money. And I will need to invest in a winery.

Hugs for me!! My hair really isn't cut in amullet, aka the Kentucky waterfall. I promise.

Thanksgiving fun!

We have Bram's Thanksgiving feast at his mother's day out today. Yea! I am so excited.

Truly, what is more fun than eating instant mashed potatoes and canned cranberries with 60 two, three, and four year olds wearing paper pilgrim and turkey hats?

If I am really lucky, the four year old class will serenade us with holiday songs while enjoying our tasty Thanksgiving delicacies.

AND to add to all the fun and excitement, our wiggly one year old, that throws food, will be joining us.

Lots of pictures will be taken. Can't wait.

Too bad we aren't Catholic, that would totally up the odds that wine would be served. No such luck with the Methodist.

Maybe I didn't explain it correctly.....

I ordered the infamous Elf on a Shelf, mostly just to try to get some order in this house. And this was the perfect scare tactic in my book of parenting.

An elf that watches your behavior. Some very smart mom thought of this one. Some very smart mom that was very desperate for some holiday peace and quiet.

Anyway, I explained it last week to Mr. Bram. Told him that on December 1 a silly little elf, one of Sant's helpers, is going to start watching his behavior to report to Santa. That the elf would be "hiding" all over the house so Bram (and Tess) would never know where and when they were being watched.

I could see his wheels spinning.

So for the past several days, he has been wanting me to talk to him about this elf. A lot. How many more days until December 1? Is today the day the elf comes? Can I see the elf before he starts hiding? Those types of questions.

Then today, I realized why the poor guy was so oddly fascinated with the elf, with one sad little conversation:

Bram: "Is today December 1?"

Me: "No buddy, I promise you I will let you know as soon as it is. It is going to be so much fun when the elf shows up, reading the elf story and then seeing where he hides. You sure seem to be excited!"

Bram: nervous laugh. "Yeah, it is going to be cool. Is the elf really big or really little?"

Me: "He is small like a doll. He will sit on the mantle, in the kitchen, or in your room. The little guy will find a new spot to hide every night."

Bram: another really nervous laugh. "Well, when he gets here can I see him first."

Me: "Sure buddy. We will read the special book with him."

Bram: "I don't know about this. I really don't want him jumping out yelling "BOO!" at me."

Me: blank stare and full of the guilties.

All this time, my poor Brammy was thinking that some creepy little elf was going to hide in our house and jump out yelling "BOO!" at him. How terrible. I am sure he thought I had completely lost my marbles.

I knew something was a little troubled with his fascination with the Elf on the Shelf. His laughter and smile a little uncomfortable. Knocks on our front door seemed to put him into a tiny little panic.

Luckily, I explained it a little better and he seems more relaxed about our future visitor.

Because I promise you I am not giving up this Elf on the Shelf discipline goodness. No way.

Nobody make any sudden moves

Guess who slept all night without his paci?

This guy.
I don't think he realized he did until I went crazy with excitement, hi-fiving him and such.

Then he immediately went sullen, see above picture.

I think I should of just kept my mouth shut. Now he is on a mission to find one.

Poor guy, I am fighting the urge to hand him one and rock him like a baby. It must be hard kicking the habit. But it had to stop. I don't want him being the kid in high school that sucks a paci while taking a test, or sucking a paci before and after football practice. Sitting in the movie theatre on a date with a paci in his mouth.

I can hear him digging through one of his toy baskets for one. It is really kind of sad. Let's all say a prayer for the little man. HE CAN DO IT!!!!

Three year old QUOTE OF THE DAY

"You wanna piece of me?"

Where in the hell does he get this? Has Little Bill turned into a thug?

My, my, my.....

Froggity has bestowed this lovely little award to ME! Thanks so much you hot mama. If y'all haven't already gone and checked her out, I highly recommend. She is funny, adventurous, and a great daily read. And she has a little lady that is so cute you will want to eat her up.
I definitely consider her one of my great blogging buddies!

On another note, Hubby is hunting, again, and I have nothing planned for the kids and I. Any suggestions? Hubby's step sister is a paramedic in Austin, maybe I'll load everyone up to check out the fire station and do some Christmas shopping. Hmmmmm.......

Suggestions are definitely welcome.

I can't believe I'm doing this....but OK

I have just signed up for the 3M half marathon on January 25, 2009 in Austin, Texas.

I am telling all of you, because now I can't back down.

10 weeks to train. I know I can do it!

Now, I have to go out and buy several white sports bras, some volleyball type panty shorts, and some hair extensions. And I will have to get my nips tattoed a darker color and find a great waxer.

Apparantley that kind of "look" gives you the energy for a more sufficient work out.

It's practically proven.

Im lovin' it!

This morning I got up and realized I was out of coffee AND milk.

Bad for mommy, bad for babies. What is one to do?

Throw the kids in the car and head to the Mickey D's.

I love love love our McDonald's and it isn't for their fine culinary delights.
Oh no.
It is so much more than that. It is for Sassy Lady in the window.

This morning it was early, I threw on my work out clothes, flip flops. Bram was in his jammies, as was Miss Tessie. We were looking mighty fine as we pulled up to order. And when I heard HER voice, a huge smile spread over my face.

My morning had been officially made.

sassy lady: "Welcome to McDonald's, baby, how can I take your order?"

pretty me: "Yes, I would like a large coffee with three creams and a splenda, two white milk jugs, and a #1."

sassy lady: "Of course, sweet baby girl, that was a large coffee with three creams and a splenda, two white milk jugs, and a #1, pretty angel girl."

pretty me: "Yes, ma'am, that's it."

sassy lady: "You just pull around sweet darling baby. Ok beautiful?"

At the window:

sassy lady: "That will be $6.97 darling angel. My Lord in Heaven above will you look at those two doll babies in the back seat. Those two sets of dimples have just made my Friday. How blessed you are, beautiful angel mom."

pretty me: "Yes, ma'am. You have no idea how lucky I am."

sassy lady: "Here you go darling. You have an unbelievable weekend, you enjoy enjoy those precious dumplins!"

Seriously, this is in no way, shape, or form exaggerated. Sassy Lady is like this every time I drive through. And I drive through quite a bit for a diet Coke and bottled water. I just love her.

Sassy Lady puts such a beautiful, happy spin on ordering. She might make me so giddy one day, I might end up ordering a McRib!!!!

In fact, I am going to call her manager right now!

Stupid banana

Somebody has taught Bram the word stupid. And I swear it was nobody living in our house, stupid is not one of my words of choice.

If Bram said, "Dammit to hell!" Then I would not question where he got that word, or sentence, and I would not be writing this post. I would pretend it never happened.

I am assuming that it is a classmate because he is not using the word correctly. At. All. And most adults do know how to properly use the word stupid.

For example, as we were driving home he said he really wants to go see that new, "stupid movie about the dog." And I say, "Bram, we don't say stupid. I don't want to hear that coming out of your mouth again."

Five minutes later, "Is that lady riding a stupid horse down the stupid street?"

"Bram! Do not use that word again. And you aren't even saying it right."

Just now he walks in, "Mom, can I have stupid banana?"

It is so frustrating when those son of a bitch kids at school teach my freaking kid words I don't approve of. Especially when their dumb asses don't even teach him to use the damn word correctly.

Oh Casey!

Casey and I were matched in my magical wine glass swap, and look how precious!!!!

Now y'all who are doing the swap and haven't found anything yet, don't panic. Casey has a tiny touch of OCD and is extremely on the ball. She has received nada from me yet, as I can't seem to make up my mind.

Isn't it the greatest of all wineglasses. I will totally cry if my drunk ass ever breaks this.

Premature Santa discussion

I had the "Santa's watching" talk with Bram on Monday. Two days later, I have been asked, "Is today the day Santa is coming?" 4,000,356,984 times.

And that is not exaggerating one bit. Promise.

One funny and positive Santa aspect is, when Bram does or says something ugly, I stop and look around like someone is watching. My eyes all big and freaked out. Maybe nod my head up at the sky or point to Bram and mouth fake words in the air, like "yep, he isn't listening" as if I am really talking to Santa or a random elf. This leaves him in quite a panic and he immediately snaps back into shape.

It is going to be a loooong, yet very entertaining, 6 weeks. I love the holidays!!!

Dear lady at the gym with the huge boobies

Hi, I am the mom on the elliptical machine next to you. I just wanted to give you a few words of wonderful advise in regards to working out in a public place, especially in a small town. Just to help you out because I am super nice like that.

First of all, your body rocks the house. It really does, and you should be very proud of the work and money and you have clearly put into it. But you triple D boobies don't really fit well into that white sports bra you were wearing today. White is also a look that you might want to avoid, especially since your nipples are as black as coal. When you sweat, your white sports bra gets a little more see through as your work out progresses. This is a tip you should really pay attention to. Very distracting.

If you were wondering why all of the little old men kept staring at you, this might be reason number one.

Second, the noises you make while working out on the elliptical are odd and pretty disturbing. I had my ipod on and could still hear the weird grunting/moaning that was going on as you worked your little ass out on level 20 and incline 10. Great job by the way! These noises should be left in the bedroom, if you are into that sort of thing.

If you were wondering why all of the little old men kept staring at you, this might be reason number two.

Third, I am not sure those volleyball type panties you had on as your "work out shorts" are wise. Your ass, thighs, and abs do look pretty incredible in them. Yea you! However, they are a tad bit revealing.

You must wax yourself bald in order to bust out those suckers at the gym! And waxing yourself bald is a right every woman or man has, and in this situation, I am very glad you chose this route. If I would of had on those puppies, people would of thought I had Gary Coleman stuffed down my shorts.

Just so you know, Nike has a huge selection of work out shorts that are very comfy and more appropriate in a family environment. Look into them. For the love of the tiny 8lb 7oz baby Jesus. Look into them.

If you were wondering why all the little old men were staring at you, this might be reason number three.

Fourthly, if there are 8 elliptical machines available, please don't pick the one RIGHT NEXT TO ME.

Not that I am insecure or anything but I feel I need to explain. I don't do my hair and makeup in order to work out. Nor do I put on all of my diamonds (or in my case diamond and czs) on for my daily work out.

I prefer your basic Target sports bra and a tank that has been down graded from "cute wear" to workout wear. These are tanks and tees that are usually bleached somewhere or a child has wiped breakfast hands on or in worse case scenarios snot.

And for the record, this morning I couldn't find matching socks. That was the reason for my one Texas Tech sock and my one Lacoste hot pink one. Not that I care what you think. I'm just saying.

But whatever. Just don't work out next to me again, with your circus titties flopping around and your hiney cheeks hanging out. And all of your makeup and big hairdo. Just don't. Maybe I have personal space issues. You never know.

And that is the reason that I kept staring at you!

Sincerely,
Coco

Coincidence? I think not.

The Bible, a wine guide, and book to help mother's deal manage anger.

These are all sitting nicely on my nightstand.

Sad.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

This weekend was such a great time. We stayed up until 3 am on Friday then up until 2 am on Saturday.

Who am I? Really?

On Saturday we got up for a walk (this is VERY different from the Ranch Weekends of old, when we would sleep super late). Everyone of us had even packed walking gear. Can you say...grown ups?

We are all walking, talking, laughing and then.............................................


SHAZAM! We all stop dead in our tracks. On either side of the road are these monsterlike creatures. Rarely seen in their natural habitat.

You would of thought that we had come across a heard of mountain lions. How do we handle our confrontation with these savage beasts? Do we run past them? Or do we tuck and roll across their paths? Should we turn around and just head back home, not wanting to leave our children motherless.

It was a bold decision, but we decided that we could sneak across without drawing attention to ourselves. And we all made it safely to the other side.

I guess they had already forgotten the shrill screams and yelling that went on when we approached them. Cows aren't very smart animals.

And I guess we really aren't either. When hungover.

Large and in charge!

I am back from a fabulous weekend!

I am also back with some extra poundage. This I am sure of. I feel yucky and bloated.

So from here until Thanksgiving, it is serious. Operation Skinny Bitch is going into a covert special ops mission.

About to load the kiddos up and head back to the house. I stayed in Weatherford with the parentals last night. Easier to deal with a hangover when you have back up.

Y'all know how it is.

RANCH WEEKEND 2008

This weekend is my annual Girl's Ranch Weekend 2008!! 10 of us pretty little Red Raiders get together the 2nd weekend of November EVERY YEAR and this will be our 12th year.

It is called "Ranch Weekend" because it started 12 years ago at a girlfriends family ranch. Now we change things up every year. Barton Creek Spa last year, Fredericksburg B & B the year before. This year it is at a girlfriend's lakehouse.

So much fun! Though most of us still talk weekly (even daily) it is fun to get our drink and eat on MINUS kids and husbands. A lot of laughing, a lot of dancing, and a lot of relaxing. So much fun and I just can't wait.

I am sure I will be returning Sunday with a hangover and lots o' stories.

Hubby is heading to the deer lease, so Tess and Bram will be dropped of at the designated grandparents house for the weekend. My mother in law is getting Tess this weekend per request. If you didn't already know, I didn't just have a girl, I had the girl. So Miss Tessie Mayes is going to be all kinds of spoiled this weekend!

My mom and dad get the Braminator, bless their souls. He is super excited and will get lots of trips to Target for "toy shopping", lots of riding around in the jeep, and enough junk food to turn his poop royal blue. And that happens.

I am almost giddy with excitement! Have a great weekend!!! I will be drinking enough wine and vodka bevs for all of you!!

A fun preppy swap!

Clemsongirl, who is a daily read of mine, is hosting a preppy Christmas swap.

I have done one other swap and got some super cute Halloween goodies from Jo.

Y'all join in on the fun!

Sideshow FREAK

I just got back from getting my nails did and had my brows waxed by the new waxer.

Apparently I have been walking around with a beard. A beard.

Why hasn't anyone mentioned this to me before. As it is something that I would of taken care of. Immediately.

Turkey Project

Casey gave me the idea for the sweetest little Thanksgiving project. It is a little construction paper turkey and each day Bram tells me what he is "thankful" for and I write it on a paper feather and glue it to the turkey.

I started November 1, so we have four feathers so far. This is what my Brammy is thankful for as of November 4:

Nov. 1- Juice
Nov. 2- candy
Nov. 3- Transformers

And yesterdays choice really allowed me to blow out a HUGE sigh of relief,
Nov.4- Jesus

I can't wait to see what today's is. It is quite impossible to top yesterdays!

I don't care what you say

But John McCain is a class act.

Now what?

Now y'all can see the effing header. How the hell do I change the template?

I can't seem to get the stupid background that I want. I just want plain black. And when I select that and save, my header goes away.

Somebody please help me. It looks like shit.

I am a very stupid person

I have a very cute new custom header that I just designed. A cute little header that I am apparently too dumb to figure out how to get it on the mother fucking blog.

If y'all don't hear from me for awhile, it will be either/or:
I am shit housed drunk from frustration or
my computer has been run over repeatedly by a red Tahoe.

SON OF A BITCH I AM SO IRRITATED BY MY LACK OF COMPUTER SKILLS!!

SHIT, DAMN, PISS, FUCK!!!!

Me and my big fat mouth!

I was chatting with a girlfriend yesterday and made the statement, "Neither of my kids have ever had a stomach bug. Ever. I am sooo lucky."

Guess who woke up with the pukes last night.

That's right, Mr. Bram.

This kind of thing is where I am usually very supersticous. Statements like that don't come out of my mouth unless I am knocking on some wood.

I didn't knock on any wood yesterday. Dammit!

Three year old QUOTE OF THE DAY!

"I AM THE COOLEST KID ON THE PWANET!!!!!"

We really need to work on his self esteem issues.

I just love being tagged!!!

Londie has tagged me! I love being tagged because I get to talk about myself, and also it gives all of my thousands of readers a little more insight to the Coco.

Here are the rules:
1. Link to your tagger and list these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by including links to their blogs.
4. Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blogs

Here we go:

1. I want a third baby. Really this time. I don't feel like our family is quite complete. I either need a Scout Frances or an Augustus "Gus" Burns to finish out our precious family.
Hubby is very much NOT on board so I will have to make do with the two I already have.

2) I have a tiny obsession with Beyonce. I want her body so bad that when I run, I must have tons of Beyonce songs on my ipod. This motivates me big time.
In my super active imagination, her ass is achievable.

3) Country Living magazine is my "bible." It is SO my taste in home decor and one day I will actually accomplish a room that would make that publication very proud. And they will come photograph said room and then I will frame it and hang in my bedroom to look at every night before bed.

4) I talk a lot. A lot a lot. Always have and I guess I always will.

5) I am an obsessive leg and underarm shaver. If I take three showers on a particular day, then my pits get shaved three times. My legs get shaved nightly, I can't stand the feeling of stubble in jeans or rubbing on my sheets. Yuck. But I am not obsessive with my bikini line. At. All. Poor Hubby.

6) I have Dance Party USA with my kids every afternoon. Without fail. The music is loud and we seriously break it down. I have secretly taught Bram to do "jazz hands" and how to sashay. Tess is now partaking in our Dance Party USA festivities and can shake it like nobody's business.

7) I think I could be pretty gawdy if I didn't hold back. I like things sparkly and big. Big hair, big boobs (don't have any but intend to very soon), long fake nails. Lots of jewelry, turqoise and coral, concho belts. I seriously should of been a country and western singer.
Sadly, my hair is a tasteful bob, I dress trendy but conservative. My nails are acrylic but very short. Highlights are minimal. Boobs will be a small C.
But if I could, oh the possibilities.

So I want to hear from some of my favorite reads. I tag:

Angie
Michelle
KDLost
Coco
Shannon
Shannie
Deb

You think you know, but you have no idea....

The mad super hero skills this kid possesses.

And when you have on a Batman/Ironman costume combo.......

Let's just say the possibilities are endless.

OH NO HE DIDN'T!

Who the hell taught him this?

I guess he missed the Texas Tech/UT game Saturday night.

GET YOUR GUNS UP!!!!!!!!

An old man in a 32 year olds body

Hubby just asked me who Rod Stewart was. No lie.

A few months ago, after seeing a picture of Bono, he asked, "Who is that?" Ummm.....

One year ago he said, "you know that Ozzy Osbourne guy?" Are you serious?

And the topper. Homeboy has never ever purchased a CD in his life! Doesn't even own one. Never has.

Wine glass PARTY!!!

WOOOO HOOOOO! It doesn't get more exciting than this people!!! It is time for our holiday wine glass exchange.

This is a small yet exclusive group of hot mamas that choose to partake in this super duper fun event!!

If you didn't sign up in time, then I will pray for you tonight. Because you are going to be a real sad mamacita when a fun or beautiful wine glass doesn't show up at your door.

So here is the match ups, drawn randomly by Hubby.

Coco (me) and Casey

Michelle and Londie

Deb and Steph

KD Lost and Dana

Try to keep the pretty glass at around $10 and make sure to snuggly ship it.

The different wine glasses are so much fun. I promise, you will want to start your own collection.

FUN!

The BEST Halloween yet!

This was the best Halloween YET!! Bram was a riot and Tess, well.....Tess will get it together next year. But little sister was definitely a trooper.

We all met up for pizza and wine (and juice boxes) at Kell's house. Took lots of pictures and then as it got dark, the Trick or Treating fun began.

The funny thing is, we live in a gated community so everyone shows up in their golf carts. Our kids are going to grow up so lazy!!

I remember trekking through my neighborhood until my plastic high heels rubbed bloody blisters on my feet.

Anyhoo, Tess just sat in my lap in our golf cart, eyes open in pure amazement at all of the activity. Kids running everywhere! I sat, sipped my wine, and laughed my ass off at Bram. Running from house to house, spider legs flying in the wind. Yelling "THANK YOU" as he was running off with his newly collected loot.

Every holiday gets soooo much better the more he understands. He was such a big boy last night. I was so proud watching him say his "please and thank yous", following all of the big boys up to the lit porches. Sitting up on the trailer stacked with hay while driving from street to street. I loved every second of it.

So did Hubby. So did Brammy. Life is good.

What is even better, my little butterfly will be able to partake in all of the fun next year.