Sunday, September 7, 2008

Cuckoo for Coco Puffs

This post might not make a lot of sense because it would take a lot of background for everyone to get the full effect of this particular person and her history of crazy. But in a it goes.

My best friend Kell and I met an old friend and sorority sister for drinks and dinner Friday night in Dalls. Leigh, Kell and I were inseparable our freshman and sophomore years at Tech. But something weird happened and we "broke up". Kell kept somewhat in touch. Me, not so much.

Since the Facebook phenomenon Leigh got in contact with Kell and I and we agreed to meet up and catch up. I was due for a visit in Dallas anyway, so it was set.

We met up at Cru bar which is a lovely wine bar. When Leigh walked in, we hugged and were so excited to see one another. We ordered a great Pinot Noir and sat down to catch up.

That is when Candid Camera apparently started filming.

From that point on, Leigh talked about herself. For three and a half hours she talked about her divorce, her sex life, how she is SUPER successful, about her two rent houses, about how much she travels, everything about HER and her GREY FOX (which is what she calls her super sexual boyfriend). I am seriously surprised Kell and I don't have bruises on our shins from kicking each other under the table so. many. times.

It was nuts. Oh! She did ask us how our sex lives with our husbands were. We just stared at her blankly and nodded, "good, it's good." I mean, I am all about talking about sex but not really with someone I haven't seen in 10 years and not really with someone who clearly didn't take her meds that morning.

I seriously don't think she even knows Hubby's name, or Kell's Hubby's name. She did comment on how she loved my kid's names, so apparently that information got out there somehow.

And that is another weird thing, she has a seven year old child and NEVER really talked about him. She brought up how great of a baseball player he was but that was about it. Most of the time, you have to shut moms up about their kids.

About three hours into the night when she started talking about anal sex with her ex husband, I had to put my napkin over my head and just lost it. I couldn't stop laughing. Just couldn't. I had had enough. Kell just looked at her and said, "Wow".

At that time I looked at my watch and said, "well, the sitter is expecting us. It was so wonderful to catch up!"

The valet pulled our car around and we sped off. I seriously think that I might of burned some rubber pulling away. We laughed our asses off all the way home. The next morning we just kept rehashing the night and shaking our heads. It was so weird and icky, but funny as well.

Facebook is fun and I have reconnected with some friends that I will never lose contact with again. But this was a Facebook connection gone bad. Sad thing is, I think Leigh thought it was a Facebook connection gone good. WOW.


morewineplease said...

WOW!! WOW!!! What a nut jump, your medication comment had me rolling!
At least you have another "memory"!

Angie said...

You are cracking me up! I hope you stay the hell away from that crazy b! Seriously, what a freak show!

Michelle Matthews said...

What a strange night. I guess you won't be meeting up with her again?! You are hilarious. Hilarious.